NOBODY wants to read about THAT


[Disclaimer: There’s nothing horribly interesting written here, it’s just something I wanted to write. Don’t say I didn’t warn you!]


And by that I mean BREAST FEEDING, errrr, nursing. I’m done. I thought I would be happy and feel liberated and everything else, but I really don’t. When Jackson got really sick for most of his sixth month the demand really wasn’t there, so the supply mostly disappeared. I dried up, for lack of a better word. I tried to make it work but my chronically fussy and constipated baby told me it wasn’t.

So, that was it. I just couldn’t take it anymore. Nursing was horrible, he wasn’t ever happy. I said. THAT IS ENOUGH! And started him on the difficult task of adjusting to the bottle. He wouldn’t take one from me for the better part of 3 days. Misery for both of us (mommy + baby).  But, he’s drinking nearly 30 ounces everyday and MAN! this kid can poop and pee. These are things that allow me to believe I did the right thing.

But, I really miss it. I NEVER thought I would ever say that.  Sunday, I took him into the nursing room at church and found myself horrifically overcome with mommy guilt. 2 mommies were nursing while I plopped that bottle in my baby’s mouth faster than you can say nipple confusion. I knew I wasn’t being judged but it still was not a good feeling.

Oh, crap.

Pardon the motherly overtones here, but I miss feeding my baby.  But I do suppose he’d still be starving and dehydrated and I’d be resenting the task of nursing.

Maybe I am just realizing that he won’t stay small forever?! He’s growing bigger and bigger and bigger every day.

And, did I mention he is just the most perfect baby ever? He is.


  1. I hate nursing too. I do it because it is good for him, but I would much rather pop a bottle in his mouth. I even like PUMPING and feeding him a breast milk bottle better than nursing. I always thought I would let him self-wean, but if going back to work at 6 months is just too much with the nursing, he is done, or at least partly!

  2. Ah, I'm so sorry. Breastfeeding was definitely not as easy as I thought that it would be. It seems so natural, but it's actually such a chore. An enjoyable chore when things are going right--but a chore nonetheless. The important thing is that Jackson is eating and growing and thriving. And I know that I'll also miss it when Ella is done.


So, whaddya think?

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